You Can Set It Down Jonas 1 05 11 24

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Dhammarato: Jonah. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to start from the very beginning. And the way that I start with the very beginning is in two ways. In fact, the Buddha, in his very first talk, he starts off with the middle path, and then he teaches the Eightfold noble path. But one of the things that we have to begin to understand that almost always our Western society is in one extreme or the other. Okay, go to one extreme or the other. Now, when you’re at one extreme and you look back at the other extreme, if you see somebody in the middle, they look like the territory other extreme, just a little bigger. And so the middle path is to find a balance between the extremes. And there’s always a way to find this out so that we can find a middle path. An easy and clear example for students is that the past is one extreme and the future is another extreme. And the middle path, the balance between them is right here, right now. Another one would be the extreme of East. Way east. There’s so much happening. Really, really east. I know. I’m pointing west, and then we point west and say way over there. But the balance between what is way over east and what is way over west is right here. This is what we mean by here. Now.

Dhammarato: Now is in the balance between the past and the future. And the here is the balance between that place and somewhere else.

Jonas: Is it also about the balance between, like, good and bad?

Dhammarato: No. Good and bad are judgments. And so a balance would be not judging too much and not judging too little. And what that means is to begin to see things as they really are rather than judging them. Because both good and bad is just a condition of the mind. You like it and you don’t like it. Therefore, you choose that it’s good or bad. And we always do that ignorantly. But when we become wise, we have wise wants and wise judgments that, in fact, the wise want would be wanting the things that you can have immediately. And stupid wants is wanting things. You don’t even know where they are or how to get them or where they’re going to come from or how long it’s going to take. That’s pretty stupid. And yet that’s how everyone starts off in the practice of the Dhamma. Okay, so there are suttas where the Buddha said that he only teaches one thing. He says both now and before. I teach only one thing. And what is that? He referred to it in Nepali as dukkha, dukkha-nirodha. Now, dukkha actually means dissatisfaction. You probably heard it referred to as suffering. Yeah, right. Are you suffering right now?

Jonas: No, I’m not.

Dhammarato: Probably not. Okay. Are you dissatisfied with some things? Probably, yeah. Yeah. That’s why you call me.

Dhammarato: Yeah. So this is the kind of way that we look at it is that most people have a wrong understanding of what is dukkha. Some people even go so far as to say that life itself is dukkha. But in fact, an easy way for you to understand that’s not true is hold your breath. Just hold your breath for five minutes, ten minutes, an hour. I bet you can’t do it. Why? Because deep down inside, even down to the body as well as the mind, you want to be alive. You want to be alive so much that anything that threatens life itself or anything that even reminds you remotely of life itself, that’s dukkha. It’s not life itself is dukkha. But anything that threatens life then would be dukkha. Like for instance, seeing a letter in the mail or getting an email from your boss before you open it, it’s already a life threatening situation. So this is what we mean then by dukkha, dukkha-nirodha is that if you can see the dukkha, if you can see your dissatisfactions, then you can come out of them. You can make a choice to come out. And you have many, many techniques of Western Buddhism. Sort of like. Have you ever heard of the term noting?

Jonas: Noting?

Dhammarato: Like writing down noting? No. At least you don’t know noting. Okay, so noting is also referred to as the mahasi method. Have you ever heard of the word mahasi?

Jonas: No, I’ve not.

Dhammarato: Okay, but you have read books on Zen, I suppose.

Jonas: Just, it’s one. Do you know the Cat who Taught Zen?

Dhammarato: Pardon?

Jonas: The Cat who Taught Zen. It’s like a child’s book with these Zen chords packed in a story.

Dhammarato: Oh, I see. Okay. I thought that you meant you’d been reading real Zen, Mike Roshi.

Dhammarato: Okay, all right. So you read a child’s book on Zen. I get it. So this whole point of dukkha, dukkha-nirodha then unpacks into the four noble Truths. And the first noble truth is, is that dissatisfaction exists. Yeah, it exists. Why does it exist? It exists primarily because we like things and we don’t like things and we like and don’t like ignorantly, we’re not aware of it. A lot of stuff happens that’s subconscious. An example is somebody has anxiety and are driven to go buy a car.

Dhammarato: Instead of dealing with the anxiety directly, they think they can get rid of the anxiety by buying a car. Guess what? Buying a car is not going to cure anxiety. It’s going to create more. A whole lot of anxiety while buying a car. Whole lot of anxiety. Filling out the papers. So buying a car is not going to relieve anxiety. Or in fact, going and buying anything, makeup, a new handbag, a house, a girl, whatever it is that you want. People want things because they’re trying to get rid of fear and anxiety. And so the right practice would be is to deal with it directly. But we have to be wise in order to do that because we ignorantly assume that if I go do something in the outside world, then I will feel better. But if we’re in the habit of feeling a certain way, that whatever we do on the outside world, we’re still going to feel the same way. Because we’re not dealing with feelings, we’re dealing with things out in the world. And so this is the ignorance that we have is we’re looking for love in all the wrong places.

Dhammarato: And the real place to look is within. Within your mind, within your body, within your feel, within the mind’s objects, within the mind’s states.

Jonas: So you say that we find that love rather, rather within instead of outer, like satisfactions. Right.

Dhammarato: Well, let me make it like this. We look for love because we think that we need it. Nobody needs love. If you’re happy, you don’t need to be loved. Yeah. Love is something that we look for. That’s the substitute, that’s ignorance. In fact, looking for love. Maybe if we would stop looking for things altogether, we’d just be okay. But we’re out there looking for stuff.

Dhammarato: So love is like a car. It’s not going to make you feel better.

Dhammarato: So this is what we mean by then, that this cause of dukkha, the cause of dissatisfaction is ignorance. If we did things wisely, then we could see what was going on and make any changes that were needed and then we’d be okay.

Dhammarato: And then in fact, we are okay from time to time. From time to time you’re not in a state of dissatisfaction. But in Western society you have been taught to be dissatisfied in a way. You could say that every young child, every tiny infant is born in a state of being needy. It needs to be fed, it needs to be diapered, it needs this, that and the other thing. The tender infant doesn’t know language. He doesn’t even know how to use his hands. Well, how is he going to pick up a sword and walk into battle? He can’t do it. So we start off in infancy as a victim is needing help. And mom gives us that nourishment. She gives us that help. But that doesn’t last for very long. By the time a child is 2 or 3 years old, mom begins to order the child around, hold my hand, go to the toilet. Then is. Later is pick up your toys, clean your room, then is go to school. And so you see, mom begins to order the child around, which means that mom’s a boss and the child is the victim of mom’s bossiness.

Dhammarato: Then we remain victims in school, remain victims of bullies. Even if we’re a bully, it’s because we’re a victim. And so we remain in that state of being a victim for our whole lives until we make a change in our attitude. But that’s not going to be easy to do because we’ve gotten into such a habit of thinking that everything is bigger than us. We need doctors, we need lawyers, we need preachers, we need teachers, we need this, that, and the other thing. So if we can come out of that state of need and be okay the way things are, then we can be satisfied. Now, satisfaction exactly opposite of dukkha. How can you actually train yourself to be satisfied?

Jonas: But can we also accept that we need stuff except that we need it or that we are in a position of needing as a human being?

Dhammarato: Well, are you then beginning to talk about wise wanting as opposed to ignorant wanting?

Jonas: Yeah, so it’s rather.

Dhammarato: Maybe.

Jonas: So it’s rather than a practice of, like, accepting, okay, I’m a human being and I need stuff. Or I’m not. Like, I’m not an enlightened being, so I’m still on the path. Or I accept that I still need stuff.

Dhammarato: Okay, so that’s a failure. That’s a victim’s position. Accepting that you’re a victim. Okay, yeah, maybe you’re already enlightened and you don’t know it.

Jonas: Maybe. Maybe.

Dhammarato: So it’s maybe if you started having good thoughts, like, hey, I’m already. Okay, I’m already enlightened enough. This is good enough.

Jonas: So it’s so it’s. So it’s much more about the changing of the. Of my attitude.

Dhammarato: Yes, change of your attitude and changing of your thoughts. And the way that we begin to change our attitude is first by changing our thoughts to see that our thoughts are unwholesome. They’re the thoughts Of a victim. Because our attitude is of a victim.

Dhammarato: And if we begin to practice correctly, then that means that we are become aware of the kind of thoughts that we’re having. So that we can change our thoughts.

Dhammarato: Instead of accepting that things are terrible, maybe we can look to see that. Oh, I’m putting the terrible in it due to my victim’s attitude. The victim sees everything as terrible and a winner says everything’s okay. So that’s the change in attitude and the way that we begin, that is by changing our thoughts. And then we can change our attitudes, then we can change the way we feel and we can get the body to help us do that. For instance, if you are in real danger, if the body is actually in danger, like sitting in traffic, then it’s hard to feel safe when you’re actually in danger. The reality is that you’re in danger. However, most of the time the reality is that you’re not in danger. And yet we still are fearful because we perceive danger where it’s not. Why do we do that? Because we’re in the habit of it. We were raised as if the world was a dangerous place. So we see danger everywhere when in fact it doesn’t exist most of the time.

Jonas: So this means that we. That we always have the decision to. Right.

Dhammarato: You have a choice. Every time you see what’s going on, when you are blindly just trudging along, when you’re in ignorance, then you’ve got no choice about it. You’re going to do the thing the way that you’ve always done them.

Jonas: And how to deal with these situations. When I, for example, when I try to be all right, or I. Or I try to have wholesome thoughts, but then I notice that I get unwholesome thoughts.

Dhammarato: So all right, so now you’re a victim again then. In fact, the word try is a victim’s word.

Jonas: Right?

Dhammarato: Because I expect failure. And then you have failure. And they say, yeah, there it is again, I failed.

Jonas: So I. I say try because I’m not fully confident of doing it right.

Dhammarato: All right, well now that’s part of the practice is to become comfortable, see that you’re uncomfortable, and change that to being comfortable. I mean, you made the uncomfortable up. Why don’t you make up some comfortable instead? So it’s always constantly making stuff up. That’s a key ingredient. Is the reason why we are in dukkha when we are dissatisfied is because we made up that dissatisfaction. Yes. And we did because we were in the attitude of making stuff up. This fearful.

Jonas: I think also oftentimes it is I feel doubt, like, doubt that I doing the method right. And.

Dhammarato: Or. And what that means then when you have doubt is that now you’re going to deal with the doubt. And rather than say, oh, doubts, just another unwholesome thought, let me just throw that thought out and come back and just be comfortable again.

Dhammarato: So doubt is a kind of an unwholesome thought. Doubt, worry, flurry, ruminating.

Jonas: But how to deal with these situations? For example, when I called, you told me, well, you might practice your meditation wrong. And how can I.

Dhammarato: Well, how they’re practicing it wrong is not changing. They see what the problem is and they still feel bad. So they go from one bad feeling to another, and then you see that you’re feeling bad and you’ll feel bad again. Oh, I shouldn’t feel bad. So the point is that the people are not seeing correctly and they’re not making the change. This is what the Eightfold and noble path is all about. The Eightfold noble path. Have you ever heard of the word mindfulness?

Dhammarato: All right. That’s not a very good translation of the word. In the Pali, the word is sati. And sati has the quality of remembering. It has the quality of remembering to come back to the present moment. It has the quality of allowing you to see how things are. And so the twin case is to remember to look and then look. And when you see the unwholesome thought, then make a change. But most people see, they look to see unwholesome, and then they don’t like it, which is just more unwholesome. What they need to do instead is see the unwholesome and make a change. Here’s an example. You get into an argument with your aunt or your grandmother, and then you go off and you’re thinking about that argument.

Dhammarato: And you don’t like it because you didn’t win the argument that Aunt Susie won the argument. And so we start thinking about, well, what can I say to Aunt Susie that’ll win that argument next time we argue? All right, so what you could say instead is, I see that even though Aunt Susie is not even here, I’m still arguing with her right now.

Dhammarato: And I can change that. And one of the things I can say is that, wow, Aunt Susie is a good arguer. And then we can also say, wow, Susie is not here right now. Why should I argue with someone who’s a good arguer who’s not even here? In fact, the art The Susie that I’m arguing with is inside my own head. She’s not real.

Dhammarato: And so you can send Susie away happily.

Jonas: And what about. What about if also feelings are involved? For example, if I am angry, I.

Dhammarato: Could say, yeah, well, let’s work with the easy stuff first.

Dhammarato: Once you get angry, that means you’ve already fallen deep into a pile of. What we need to do is to figure out how we don’t walk into the.

Dhammarato: Because if you can keep seeing before you fall into the pile of. You’re not going to get angry. So you only get angry because you’ve had one afternoon, one unwholesome thought after another, after another after another, and you keep digging yourself deeper. When are you going to wake up? Perhaps you can wake up and say, oh, I’m angry. Let me take a rest, Let me walk away. Let me take a few breaths and settle down. But most people, they can’t see they’re angry. When they’re angry, you ask an angry person, why are they angry? And they’ll lie to you. They’ll say, I’m not angry. And they’ll say it in a really angry voice.

Jonas: I feel like often people that are angry try to make others angry.

Dhammarato: So you like to make other people angry, huh?

Jonas: I don’t like it.

Dhammarato: Well, would you do it?

Jonas: For sure. For sure. Or same. Same.

Jonas: If I’m sad, probably. If I don’t know why, probably because I got taught this way. But if I’m.

Dhammarato: Precisely.

Jonas: If I’m.

Dhammarato: What you’re doing is not original. Everything that you make up, you use from the products and the tools and all the equipment and all the parts that you’ve gotten from other people over a lifetime. So you very rarely have an original thought. Any thought that you have somebody else that you know has thought that before right in front of you, you picked it up and you remember it and then you repeat it ignorantly. So the first thing to do is to recognize that you need to get away from other people and get into seclusion. The Buddha says, go to the forest, go to a foot of a tree, go to an empty hut, go to a pile of straw, and to sit down and bring mindfulness to the core, which means begin to remember what you’re doing, Remember to look at what you’re doing right now. And normally what happens when people get away from it all, get away from all of those people and sit down in quiet, in private, in seclusion. They haven’t gotten away from those people at all. Because they’re still in the head. Yeah, they’re still dancing around in there. So now the second part of getting seclusion is to start removing that stuff one at a time. Any thought that you have event Susie, you say, aunt Susie’s not here right now. I don’t have to do that. Oh, the boss is not here right now. I don’t have to deal with him. Oh, the boss’s email is in the inbox, which is not here right now. Let me leave it. And right now I can sit here and bring myself into a state of joy, into a state of pleasure, into a state of happiness, into a state of freedom, into a state of being safe, secure, comfortable. And if you keep practicing that you’ll become satisfied. Just enough. So we’re looking for a middle path now. Just enough. Every time that I talk to somebody, they’ll say, well, what about the extreme? Well, we’re not looking for extremes. We’re not looking for extreme bliss. We’re just looking for freedom from dissatisfaction. Just enough so that you can feel satisfied. And so when you want to go to town, Wait a minute. I’m better off just sitting here. Let me not want to go to town. Let me just want to be here. Because here I am. Wanting to go to town is going to take a lot of work. Not wanting to go to town and just sitting here. That’s easy to do. Let me be satisfied just sitting here.

Jonas: Well, how can I be then also satisfied in doing?

Dhammarato: By starting to tell yourself that you’re satisfied. Start repeating it. I’m okay. Everything’s okay. Everything is fine. No worries, no flurries, nowhere to go, nothing to do, and I’m okay. And then thoughts will start up again and you can say, aha, I see that thought and I’m going to throw it out and I’m going to come back and say, everything is all right. Everything is okay. And pretty soon you begin to feel okay. Pretty soon you begin to get the attitude that I’m okay.

Dhammarato: When everything. Anytime that you see something is not okay, that’s you’re back into the attitude of a victim again. It’s not okay because you’re afraid of it. It’s not okay because it’s on top of you.

Dhammarato: That you’re covered with it. So I have always, you’re okay is when you can just set it down. So this is how we begin to practice. We begin to practice by looking at the thought and figuring out whether it’s wholesome or not. And then Change it to a wholesome thought. So it’s like, everything is okay. Everything is fine. There’s no problems. There’s no worries. I can smile. Anything that I can think of is okay, because I can set it down. Whatever it is that I’ve got on my mind, I can just set it down and come back and say, wow, I don’t have to carry that right now. Wow. I could just relax.

Jonas: All right, so. So just to. Just so that I understand this correctly, it’s not a. We don’t need all of this complex practice whatsoever. It’s simply.

Dhammarato: It’s a simple process.

Jonas: It’s. I’m good, and I can be calm. I can be okay with it.

Dhammarato: Mm. You can tell yourself that you can be calm. You can be okay. When you keep practicing that over and over, and pretty soon you feel calm. You feel okay. You have the attitude that you’re calm and the attitude that you’re okay. But we have to practice this over and over and over again because you’re already in a great big habit of being not okay. Imagine it like this, because this is a real point. If you can hold eye contact with me and stay steady. But I’ve been noticing that your eyes are. And your head is all over the place. You look up and you look down, and you look this way, and you look confused.

Dhammarato: Can you begin to notice your face? Can you notice your hands? Can you notice that your finger is on your chin?

Jonas: I can notice it.

Dhammarato: Yes. This is what the practice is. Begin to see what you’re doing and making a change. I didn’t tell you to move your finger. You change. You moved it yourself. Okay. That’s what we’re practicing, is to begin to see what we’re doing with the body, seeing what we’re doing with our feelings, seeing what we’re doing with our mental attitude, and seeing what we’re doing with our thoughts. Now, the thoughts are the most transient. They keep changing back and forth. So that’s the place to begin.

Dhammarato: And start seeing that these thoughts that I’m having about over there and back then or out yonder is not right here. Now let’s throw those thoughts out and come back to right here, right now. I’m okay.

Jonas: That’s simple, actually.

Dhammarato: Yes. It’s a simple practice, but it’s a simple practice you have to do over and over and over and over and over again.

Dhammarato: You have to train the mind because your mind has not been trained. And so you begin to train the mind by gladdening the mind by refreshing the mind, by making the mind bright. And pretty soon you begin to change your attitude, the mind state into a state of mind that’s bright, wholesome. And you keep practicing. And pretty soon you begin to feel that way. To feel bright, to feel safe, to feel secure, to feel comfortable, to feel relaxed. And then you have the body all together so that the body is safe, the body is secure, the body is comfortable, and the body is relaxed and your feelings are safe, your feelings are secure, your feelings are comfortable, your feelings are relaxed, and the feelings are of being satisfied. This is good enough. And then a thought, an unwholesome thought will come up and you say, aha, I see that. Don’t hate your thoughts. That’s what you’re probably already doing is when you have an unhappy or negative thought, you’ll say, oh, I should not have that thought, instead of just saying, hey, I see it. Hey, I’m happy that I can see it, because if I can’t see it, I can’t change it. So become happy to see whatever it is instead of judging yourself for it. Nurture yourself instead. Instead of comparing yourself to some standard, just be okay the way things are. Set the standards down, set the rules aside and be comfortable with what you’re doing. Become happy that you can see your negative, unwholesome thoughts, because only by seeing them can you change them. And after you change them to wholesome thoughts, then they’ll start back up. The unwholesome thoughts will again. Aha. I’m glad that I caught them because now I can set things straight again.

Jonas: It’S funny that I’ve. I’ve been reading or listening or watching so much, and it’s. It’s. It’s actually simple. Like what you’re saying is simple and it’s easy to understand.

Dhammarato: Well, that’s because I keep repeating it over and over again. And then you begin to see that it’s supple because you’re looking for the complex, which is a hindrance. Looking for things to be hard. And so you’re surprised to find out how simple they are.

Jonas: Yeah, and it’s also. It’s also funny. That’s. It makes sense.

Dhammarato: What are you looking at when you look up like that?

Jonas: Well, I don’t know. I feel like it’s. I don’t know. I don’t know. What I wanted to say was that. What was it that I wanted. I forgot it. I forgot what I wanted to say.

Dhammarato: Okay.

Jonas: Although it’s. Oh, I wanted to Say that it’s funny that I have never looked in that direction, even though it makes so much sense that I can just decide to be. To be good. But I’ve relied so much. Or I’ve. Maybe it’s. It’s what is taught that I have to do stuff to be happy. I have to make a practice in any particular way, or I have to. You know what I mean, That I always like, I have to do something to be happy, and I cannot be happy the way it is.

Dhammarato: Exactly. That’s the big stupidity, is that you’ve got to do something to be happy. That’s why you’re never happy. It’s because you’re out busy doing. And when you do something, then you’re still unhappy. So you do something else because you’re happy, unhappy. And then you do something else because you’re unhappy. And so you remain unhappy while you’re out there doing a bunch of crap. So why don’t we just stop doing and just start being satisfied? Have a happy thought. Instead of having a thought, oh, I’ve got to go do something to be happy. Just say, I’m okay. I don’t need to go do anything. I don’t need any love. I’m already okay.

Jonas: And it’s always coming back to that.

Dhammarato: And by the way, about Zen, one of the things that if you’re reading the right stuff, you’ll find that a Zen master will teach an advanced student that he’s already enlightened. Just sit there. Don’t try to get anything. You’ve already got everything you need. You’re already enlightened. Start acting that way. Start thinking that way. Start feeling that way. Start having the attitude that you’re already arrived. There’s no place to go. You don’t have to do anything to be happy. Just be happy.

Dhammarato: Just be satisfied. Start with satisfaction. If you keep satisfying and satisfying and satisfying, the satisfaction will grow into joy with the thoughts of, wow, I can be satisfied. Wow, I could be satisfied. That’s quite a remarkable state to be in, is when you are so happy that you can be satisfied. Because you spend most of your time, your whole life, being dissatisfied and wanting to fix it.

Dhammarato: Looking for happiness in all the wrong places. Looking for satisfaction in all the wrong places. Looking for love in all the wrong places. Outside.

Dhammarato: For satisfaction can be had by changing one’s own mind. But it needs to be practiced over and over and over again. And so this is what I would recommend. A lot of students come in and Say, oh, well, I practice an hour a day.

Dhammarato: Yeah. Well, what are you practicing? What you’re saying is you can sit for an hour and a half or an hour. What are you doing? Because the mind has a short attention span, at best about 20 minutes, that a good teacher will change the subject, you know, an hour. The classes last an hour. So the teachers have to make sure that they’re going to teach three different things. They teach one thing for 20 minutes, and they teach another thing for 20 minutes, and they Teach a third thing for 20 minutes. They keep the students occupied. So sitting for an hour means that you’re going to be wasting at least two thirds of your time. It’s better to do it in short bursts. And I would recommend instead of an hour, do 6 times 10 minutes. Practice for 10 minutes. Practice sitting there saying, I’m going to be okay. I’m going to be fine. Not a problem, not a worry in the world. Oops. And Susie popped in my mind, get out, Aunt Susie, I’m coming back and I’m just going to be okay without you.

Jonas: Yeah.

Dhammarato: And then the boss pops into the mind, oh, I don’t have to deal with the boss right now. Get out. Yeah, throw him out. Sham the door and say, I’m fine. I’m in seclusion. Everything is good here. Yeah, you practice that 10 times a day or six times a day. The first two times, by the way, is as soon as you wake up in the morning when you’re still in bed. Normally we get up when we can think of something that’s got to be done. The thing to do is to lay there and say, wow, everything is so fine. This is such a good day. I’m going to have so much fun today. What I do is going to be so enjoyable. Wow. I can’t hardly wait to get to it because I like it so much. And then you can get up. Same thing as when you go to bed at night. Instead of having the thoughts about, oh, I’ve got to do this and I’ve got to do that tomorrow. And people worry and don’t sleep, they cause themselves insomnia because their mind is so busy. So the right way to go to sleep is to just tell yourself, wow, this is really nice. I’m laying in bed with no place to go and nothing to do. I’ve got the next eight hours just to relax and everything is okay. And I can just lay here and everything is all right. Wow, what a nice state this is. And then we can fall asleep easy.

Jonas: What a Nice day, what a nice life. I get it.

Dhammarato: Yeah, yeah. I can talk to yourself about the fact that you live in a paradise.

Dhammarato: The room that you’re in is a nice room. You don’t have any alligators. The Russian mafia is not breaking in. The police are not breaking your door down. Your mother in law is not there. No alligators, no crocodiles, no pythons, no cobras. Everything is okay.

Dhammarato: You’re safe in that room. Why don’t you feel safe? You can practice feeling safe. Wow, I am so safe. There’s not a problem, not a worry. Nothing’s attacking me. I can begin to practice feeling safe, secure. Practice being comfortable so you can actually have those thoughts. Oh, there’s no snakes here. Wow. I feel really comfortable.

Dhammarato: I could begin to feel like I can manage my life. Because victims are out of control. Somebody else is always in control. There’s always a boss out there telling you what to do. And now you’ve taught those bosses and brought them into your head. So when the boss is in your head, which is called the parent ego state, all of the rules, would, shoulds, coulds, things that need to be done, idealism, the world needs to be fixed, it’s broken. All of those kind of thoughts and say, I’m not going to fix the world right now. It’s okay the way it is. In fact, the world is a paradise. It doesn’t need to be fixed. Yeah. So you can come out of your judgments, come out of your comparisons, come out of your standards by seeing them and then making a change, changing your words. And I’m okay, Everything is fine. So this is what we’re practicing. So you can sit down 10 minutes for six times a day, figure out when those six times are going to be. Maybe at lunch, maybe in the middle of the afternoon at tea break. You know, people in the old days, they would go out for smoke. Why don’t you go out for a healthy thought? Get away from the desk, get away from the computer, get away from the farm, get away from the field and just take a short walk and say everything’s fine, everything is beautiful.

Jonas: I will.

Dhammarato: Paradise. I’m already in heaven. Why do I keep having hell thoughts when I’m already in heaven?

Dhammarato: The answer is I’m not having any health, I’m having heaven thoughts. Because this is where I am. I’m in paradise.

Jonas: Right.

Dhammarato: So you do that six times a day and pretty soon you’ll begin to believe it. Not only will you believe it, but you can See that? It’s actually true. It’s real. It’s not a belief. It’s real. You are. Okay. That’s real. And I’m not. Okay. That’s the lies you’ve been told your whole life.

Jonas: I will practice that.

Dhammarato: Thanks.

Jonas: Thank you. So.

Dhammarato: So why don’t we finish now and you can call back again?

Jonas: Yeah.

Dhammarato: When are you going to call again?

Jonas: I’m gonna call again. When?

Dhammarato: Maybe next week.

Jonas: Oh, maybe before.

Dhammarato: Once a week will be good.

Jonas: I would. I would. I try to attend for the. For the Dharma talks you give, and I hope I can be there on Sunday.

Dhammarato: Okay. Yeah. Join us for the Dharma talks. That would be good. So how do you know about the Dharma talks?

Jonas: I’ve been fall. I think I got. So I found you through the podcast from Vikings.

Dhammarato: Guru Viking. Okay, so you’ve seen defeating him. Yeah, I’m not sure that he does. Do you know about our YouTube channel?

Jonas: I. Yeah, I know not. Not the YouTube channel, but I know the. That you publish the podcasts on, like, Spotify, and I’ve seen this.

Dhammarato: I didn’t catch that.

Jonas: You published the talks on Spotify.

Dhammarato: I saw that on Spotify. Huh? Yeah, that. Some of my friends do that.

Jonas: Right, right, right, right.

Dhammarato: Okay, so we’ve got a YouTube channel also that in fact, just Google Domarato and it’ll show you the channel.

Jonas: All right. All right, I will.

Dhammarato: So we have the. The YouTube channel, and we have groups on Saturday and on Sunday, there is also a Discord channel.

Dhammarato: And we also have a website. All of this, by the way, if you get onto the YouTube channel, in the description of every video, all of the information that you need is there. And one. One last thing is that I would strongly recommend that you join and sign up for our website. Yeah, it’s called Open Sangha Foundation.

Jonas: All right, I will look into this. I will look into this. All right, Thanks a lot.

Dhammarato: Well, Jonas is. Nice to meet you. One of the things, the last thing that I’ll say is that I’m not a teacher. I’m a friend.

Dhammarato: You be my friend. You keep calling me, and we’ll make good friends.

Dhammarato: But you don’t need a guru. What you need is to fix your own mind.

Dhammarato: We don’t need another hero. We don’t need another guru. What we need is friends.

Jonas: Well, I can be my. I can be my own guru.

Dhammarato: You can be your. You’d be better off. You were your own friend. Yeah, right.

Jonas: All right, great.

Dhammarato: All right. Well, we’ll see you.

Jonas: Bye. Bye.

Dhammarato: Okay.

Summary of this Dhamma Talk

In this talk, Dhammarato introduces a newcomer Jonas to fundamental Buddhist concepts, emphasizing the simplicity of the practice. He explains that dissatisfaction (dukkha) comes from ignorantly liking and disliking things, and that we often maintain a victim mentality from childhood. The key teaching is that happiness doesn’t require doing anything - we can choose to be satisfied right now by changing our thoughts and attitude. Rather than seeking complex practices or external solutions, we can simply practice being okay in short 10-minute sessions throughout the day, recognizing unwholesome thoughts and replacing them with wholesome ones.

Outline of this Dhamma Talk

The Middle Path

• Finding balance between extremes
• Examples: past/future balanced by present, east/west balanced by here
• Western society tends toward extremes

Understanding Dukkha (Dissatisfaction)

• Not just suffering but dissatisfaction
• Caused by ignorant likes and dislikes
• Looking for solutions in wrong places (external vs internal)

The Problem of Victimhood

• How we learn to be victims from childhood
• Carrying victim mentality into adulthood
• Getting stuck in needs and dependency

Simple Practice Method

• Practice in 10-minute sessions, 6 times daily
• Start with morning practice before getting up
• End with evening practice before sleep
• Focus on feeling safe, secure, and comfortable

Working with Thoughts

• Recognizing unwholesome thoughts
• Not judging thoughts but changing them
• Importance of seclusion and quiet time

The Path to Satisfaction

• No need to “do” anything to be happy
• Already enlightened, just need to realize it
• Practicing feeling satisfied and safe

Role of the Teacher

• Not seeking a guru but finding friendship
• Being your own friend rather than seeking external guidance
• Importance of regular practice and connection

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